Orcas Island Wedding Style

Leaping

Doing a destination wedding requires a trust between the planner and the couple. It is a leap of faith that is made when a couple books a vendor to help them make their dream come true. (Just remember the leap that got you here:  the question that was asked and response of yes has been the biggest leap of all!)

For some, it turns out their leap is made a bit too early. The vendor is booked and they are not a good fit. It happens.  I get that need that itchy scratchy feeling urging you to pull the trigger to get just things moving.

Conversely, I get the nervousness  that comes as you consider making that jump over the grand canyon of communication: being heard and understood; the resistance to making a  mistake in choosing wrongly and findng out  that this most important expression of self your wedding will be mistranslated into something that is not you.

So it is good idea to have a tool or two to use to help make the leap of faith exciting and sucessful.

To my mind, the most useful is having a sense of what generates trust in your interactions with those you do not yet know. Is it a quickly returned phone call? Is it a tone of voice or a manner of reaching out that makes you feel safe enough to share? Is it the practical voice of experience still laced with enthusiasm for you and what you are about to do? Is it a forthrightness in the giving of information or the stories told that illustrate a point of view? 

Give it a think and then make your call. It might be a much shorter leap than you thought.

The Really Big Leap!

 

 

 

Praise that is purchased

As my previous post indicated I am already nail biting about next year. A bit of worry is apparently a great motivator for me as it got me posting (hallelujah) and I did some homework.

I belong to a few online groups, tweeting clans etc. And it was through one of those that I found a grand list of links of preferred wedding (planning) vendors. My first click through brought me to a very impressive site with  interesting and smart information so I book- marked it. I wondered how do I get considered for this list?

Looking for a way on to this list I continue to click through to several other Preferred Planning Vendor websites only to discover most of then were - insipid. But I still wanted to be chosen to be on the same list that selected that first vendor.

As I searched I mused as to what I would write,what pictures I would send, what recommendations I would include to offer Patina up as a compelling candidate.

At the bottom of the article was a link to "How To Be Considered As A Preferred Vendor", which of course, I clicked through to.

Oh well. Apparently preference, that measure of quality and talent, that yardstick by which  a vendor is recommended to you and in whom you place your trust to make your wedding day perfect-could be had for $249.00. No pictures. No praise. No references. Cheap preferences sold here!

When you see a Preferred Vendor list whether on The Knot or Martha Stewart or a blog you really like (trust) you might want to double check how that preference came to be.

(something that can be relied upon to make a me feel good- an Orcas Island sunset).

 

Bittersweet, yay!

Well, this is the last week of my wedding season on Orcas Island; that is the time between May and September when we bring to life those notions and dreams that grew up between October and April. It is a relief in some respects because mounting a perfect day every week is daunting and not a little exhausting. Being able to maintain the level of caring required to attend to the unseen but yet always felt details becomes harder as the months of hardwork pass by.

But then, it is really now that we hit our stride; remembering all of the ways and means we can more easily achieve the goal, when we can use that idea that came up at the last minute just a wee bit too late to employ in last week's wedding, when we remember that we really love doing this- I mean we get to make a place for love and beauty to be shared every week. How cool is that?

And then there is the titch of fear that up here in this little piece of the world, we will not be found. That all that has gone before was an accident of chance. The couples of 2012 will miss us as they are tempted by the bounty of choice out there in the world. And so by sheer necessity of action I come back to this spot to reach out to the world again and say Hi! Look Over Here! We are waiting for you.

But there are rewards to slowing down. The first really lovely gift  is the discovery of what is going on around me. I was wonderfully touched by a friend's blog that was sent to me by another that I thought it would be selfish not to share: Jane Alden's ponderings and insights are so worth the time it takes to click the link, read the words and have your senses awakened. 

Oh- I better go I feel the tug back into this last week of design and decor. I feel the tickle of all the  errant details waiting to be wrangled, of striving once more time for the perfect day however it reveals itself.

Thanks for stopping by. Let me know how you are.

SEPTEMBER 1

Oh my. It has been a very long time since I last posted; even my  husband noticed.

Before I had a blog I had all sorts of things to say that seemed terribly important. After the first flush of blog ownership those feelings waned. It is easy to have courage when what you fear is not nearby. It's when it is right in front of you where the real test begins.

It has been a wonderful wedding season for Patina mostly because we have had the most wonderful clients. Really, every last one of them. Truly lovely people who were marrying truly lovely people. I will miss you all.

I listen to the news irregularly now because it is too difficult to follow, requires too much of my soul to endure. When last I did, day before yesterday I believe, I heard this amazing statistic about 1 out of every 46 men in this country do not have a job. It could not have been more stunning. Dustbowls in Texas. Soup kitchens crowded beyond their capacity. The song "Brother Can You Spare A Dime" has rolled across my mind ever since.

But I and those around me are blessed. We eat well, we email. We play with friends or read books. Work hard. We are living normally. How is it that we can do that but there are so very many people who will find this hour this moment insurmountably difficult. It feels like there is a thin membrane between where they are and where we are.

And in the face of it people get engaged. People get married and want to share with everyone this great joy they have found. The indominitable human spirit I guess is at work.

Some pictures to share of the work we have been doing. Hope you enjoy them. They were great fun to do. New Pics for 2011

The Season Is Open

Wedding Season is here and I thank the mysteries that we did not have June-uary this last weekend. It was gorgeous. It was perfect.

We were able to do our first Hindu Wedding Ceremony this past Saturday at the Inn at Ship Bay. It was immense work, immense fun, incredibly beautiful, very complicated, a bit messy, and fascinating. I won't say we are experts yet at Patina but I will say our learning curve was huge and we are so wanting to do more. Check out these photo's provided by Kimaya Lutz who did a wonderful assisting job for us; moving chairs, keeping the guests smiling and me too. And photos from John who with Kyler put up this Mandap and dressed out the Banquet Hall Beautifully!!!! A big thanks also to Patty, Stella and Sarah for there ever present ever beautiful support and talent. Oh, okay pictures...right....

 
Punditji with the beautiful bride Raina and her groom Nick

  Sophia and Otto stealing the show
The calm before

For more images go to:  RAINA AND NICK'S WEDDING

Orcas Island is a magical place to get married of this there is no doubt. It is also a incredible place to make magic happen. It is so much fun being a magician!

Hats

Kate and William. As a planner and designer it is an interesting exercise to imagine what working a Royal Wedding would be like. Impeccable staff helps. A full wallet doesn't hurt. But the pressure of it all requires a very strong stomach. Like as not, I will not have to test myself on that scale.

Loved the hats! I think that was my favourite part. Did you see them? If not check out this slide show link Royal Hats on the NYTimes.  Some of the hats look like they come from Yves St. Laurent via Dr. Seuss. Some went in for height. Others for brim. Don't get many events on Orcas where hats like this show up. Our loss.

Most everyone here dresses as my friend Nikki says, 'prepared for a Hiking Emergency'. Polar Fleece, tired jeans, rugged shoes and earrings. You get the image. Another friend tells the story of how she and her husband were going to an evening party and it wasn't a potluck. She came out feeling very pretty,  lovely pants and top, a bit of girl frill, jewlery and makeup. Her husband came out in pants and a polar fleece and rugged shoes, sans jewlery. They looked as if they were going to different events.

So what do you wear to an Orcas Island wedding? Unless specified for black tie or aloha party, an outfit that makes you feel very pretty, that you can where with out tugging at it to put it back in place, is the right thing. Shoes are of course a challenge. I have sadly missed several seasons of shoes that I would have loved to wear because I live here. I see a lot of women in heels twisting ankles as they chase their 3 year old off the path into the forest. I've seen Christian Louboutins aerating lawns while ruining heel and toe. Ca-ching! It is distressing to say but low heels and flats work for the grass and the dance floor. Leave the polar fleece in the hotel room. Bring a sparkely sweater or wrap. It is chilly at night for sure.

And if the mood hits and style works, wear a great hat. There are those of us here who would be so very grateful.

R&R

Back from the hot sun of the caribbean. Back into the soggy saddle of the Pacific Northwest. Hmm...Going to Chicago and NYC next; feeling gratefu since I am not quite ready to come back in full time.

Guadaloupe FWI. Lots of people think we went to Mexico but no, we went to the island known as isle de papillion(as the butterfly island) because of how it is shaped. It is between St. Martin and St. Barths.

Cases et Jardin where we stayed is a collection of the sweetest bungalows set in a lush garden. Our friends built this up as a business adjacent to their home. So we got the best of all worlds. Our own private space and the proximity to them, their glorious pool and remarkable pets. Oh and proximity to great food and gallons of Petit Ponche. A beverage that is best sipped slowly in a pool when one has no where else to go.

Some pictures might be in order here for your viewing pleasure. The pigeon is now a house pet and is unaware of the fact that he is a bird. Champi believes his dna lies somewhere between the humanoid and cannine....

 

 

This Moment

The New York Times has before and after pictures, these types of photo assemblies always please me, today they opened my heart. Northern Japan satellite photos comparing April 2010  to March 2011. They made me understand in a  3 dimensional way what the people of Haiti, Chile, New Zealand and now Japan have faced and are now facing. When I say 3 dimensional what I mean is intellectual astonishment, emotional compassion and now the added sense of the physical. My body literally hurts for these people. I feel the fear that such devastation can cause. I am not there but I am there.

Oddly enough I am not running around trying to figure what to do to help. My first reaction to a disaster anywhere. No, I am sitting here trying to go into to the feelings, the sensations to appreciate what it takes to survive this kind of event.

A friend here on island received an email from a friend in Japan. He requested our prayers but he also requested we hold the appreciation and the love of the lives we lead every day in our hearts. He requested we love now. We live now.

That I get to hear my dog Molly snoring on the couch, to think about the weddings that need attention, to excitedly pull stuff to pack as I go on vacation I am once more reminded that my life is so very blessed. It is a fragile life that can be taken away in the blink of an eye, the shake of the earth but for right now, my gratitude is what I have to offer. It is humbling.

Other Hats on Orcas Island

When I was a little girl living in NYC I would periodically (read 10x in a year) rearrange my bedroom. Today, when stressed or feeling out of sorts I will get myself sorted by rearranging the living room furniture. I wish I could do our bedroom but it doesn't offer much in the way of alternatives, that is without expense.

I wish I known about staging homes to sell sooner. It is the perfect other hat for us to wear. Weddings in the summer and staging for the rest of the year. Perfect.

Our most recent staging project required furnishing a 13 room house that was empty of all but the carpentars residual dust and a trapped bug here and there. It was a blast to do it. Make no mistake it is also very  exhausting work and taxing on the memory. Was it white towels for the upstairs half bath or the downstairs guest bath? How many toss pillows in what colours work in which rooms? You get the idea.

All the shopping is done online and in 2 or 3 big shopping trips off island. Our job is to help a buyer see themselves in the house. As each piece is placed a story about the house unfolds, a story that is aspirational, accessible, with a touch of fantasy. 

Staging is a pretty regular gig on the mainland - if you are selling your home you get it staged. I am told that a great number of realtors will not work with you  unless your home is staged. But of course Orcas Island is different.  On Orcas  we still struggle to convince people that staging really works. Maybe this job will do the convincing for us.

So here is a link to pictures of newest Other Hat job. Hope you enjoy it.SHADOW HOUSE

 

In Loving Memory

Tajz

2001-2011